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Austin Powers 2 Austin: I don't care if he is a fat bastard Felicity. You don't kick a man in the pills. It's just not cricket. City Slickers Quote Page Mitch: You know that's such a lovely image... "fuck her brains out." It ranks right up there...
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THE JOY OF JELLY BEANS

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Copyright Victoria Elizabeth 2004. All rights reserved.

THE JOY OF JELLY BEANS
--Or, how a little bit of juicy jiggle makes the world go round --

According to North American researchers, the only happy members of society these days are "Type B" personalities.

Type Bs are, by definition, not "Type A" personalities. No one could mistake them for a fault-finding flibbertygibbet or a fastidious fusspot. And, you'll never find them pushing the "Up" button feverishly on a high-speed elevator going nowhere. There is just one thing that they're driven to do at all costs, obey the posted speed limit, even when riding a unicycle.

To the dismay of the statisticians and pollsters, the only folks who truely fit the "happiest people" profile to a tee are apprenticing morticians. Not being a chipper charnel house mother, I felt I had to make the case for another category of happiness, the "Type C" personality.

"Type C" personlities are not Type As (testy toads) or Type Bs (placid pussycats). Your typical Type C is a mirthful minikin, (otherwise known as a good-natured, wee or dainty creature). This homo sapien personality simply adores the small but simple joys of life such as a serendipitous encounter with a sweet treat. And their favorite melt-in-your-mouth munchy is a jelly-bean.

To make a long story short, the "jelly bean" (a sugar coated candy) found its way into our lexicon almost a century ago. Known for their delightful diversity of colour, delicious flavour and sometimes odd texture, jelly beans are a "must have" for Harry Potter fans and damsels-in-distress.

Jelly beans are also great ice-breakers at slumber parties not to mention a "hot" topic around the wet-noodle water cooler. If nothing else, they'll certainly add oodles of fun and frolic to the world of work. Let's face it, they're a pleasant relief from the daily deluge of pointless picayune meetings, spam email about products you don't want, or vexing voice mail messages, (you really couldn't give a sweet tweet about -- even if it is from your best friend, The Easter Bunny).

The universe looks infinitely more palatable with a bit of jest and jiggle. And, the importance of this humble yummy for the tummy in the great scheme of things cannot be emphasized enough.

-- "You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans." (Ronald Reagan)

-- "Life is like jelly beans, and sometimes you get your favorite color." (Author Unknown)

-- "A friend is like a bowl of Jelly Beans... Good to the bottom of the bowl." (Author Unknown).

By the way, in case you're wondering just how vital these chewy tidbits really are, why not take a pleasurable peek at more than 116,000 websites devoted to this tasty tongue-in-cheek topic. And do enjoy a licorice lick, a chocolate chomp or a green gigglebite on me, the next time your fickle fingers feel like visiting the jocular jelly-bean jar!!


About the Author

Victoria Elizabeth enjoys musing about Life, the Universe, and Everything in between from the pages of her bodacious blog aptly entitled, "The Quipping Queen" (www.quippingqueen.blogspot.com)

 

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